Tombthing

I was cleaning out my closet this afternoon (R. Kelly would be jealous) when I found my old art projects from Elementary School. For some reason they haven’t been burned yet.
You see, I am not an artist in the slightest. And I really hated art class even as child. But because of my mother’s hoarding techniques, I happened upon my crappy art which had been shoved into the deep depths of my closet. After I blew the dust off, all the horrible memories of art class came flooding back.

However, none were as horrid as the project I titled: “Tombthing”. Yep, you read that right — “Tombthing”. Apparently, something possessed me when I was in the 3rd grade to create a creature who’s physical appearance was made up of many different creatures.

“Tombthing” ended up having the body of a lion, the head of a bull, the legs of a chicken, the tail of a lemur, and the wings of an eagle and bat. If only I had a scanner to show you this hideous creation…

But all this isn’t the worst of it. You see, I wrote a biography for “Tombthing”. And because reading it today made me laugh so hard, I shall show it to it you. Here is “Tombthing’s” story exactly as I wrote it so many years ago:

My creatures name is Tombthing. He protects the the old Pharoahs of the “Pyramids”. He likes to munch on cats and kills anybody who comes in the tomb. My creature does not like to eat the tail of the cat because it reminds him of his long lost brother who had a cat’s tail, but he later found Tofu.

-Lukas Rocks!

Um…right. The ending there is rather abrupt and completely random. But, if I’m interpreting my writing correctly, I think what I’m trying to say is that “Tombthing” later found his long lost brother “Tofu” — I guess that was my feeble attempt at a happy ending.
Besides the ending, I find the “Lukas Rocks!” to be rather appropriate. Oh, and just in case you’re wondering, I meant to put the double “the” in the second sentence because it was in the original.